As I write this my son, Gabriel Carl, sleeps peacefully in his crib.  With a slight grin, he sighs and I have to wonder what he's dreaming of.  You can count them--five fingers curled into two little fists; one he plants in his mouth.  He is almost seven months old and as perfect as can be.  It's impossible to imagine my life without him.....yet, that was almost a reality.
 
I was about eight weeks along when I found out I was pregnant.  I had been taking prescribed pain-killers for a painful disease I had been diagnosed with in 2003.  I had taken precautions to prevent pregnancy.  So, to say the least, I was not exactly pleased to be pregnant.  However, we (my family and I) would never consider the conception and birth of any baby "an accident."  
 
A week after we discovered I was pregnant I ran out of narcotics and was going to try to stop taking them.  My family doctor, who had been prescribing them to me for years, suddenly decided he "could no longer meet my needs as a physician."  I had nowhere to turn when the withdrawals became more and more intolerable.  I couldn't sleep even though I felt more tired than I can ever remember feeling.  I was constantly breaking out in cold sweats.  I had no appetite, my stomach cramped, I was suffering from severe vomiting and diarrhea and with every trip to the bathroom I was becoming more and more weak. 
 
When I finally thought I could take no more, I made my way to the Emergency Room.  I wasn't seeking pain medication--just some relief.  I was given IV fluids for dehydration and told to take Tylenol for the pain.  The doctor told me that withdrawals can cause miscarriage but that there was nothing they could do for me or my baby.  The only relief I received was the doctor's reassurance that I was through the worst of it and that my baby was doing well.  I returned home with a sense of renewed energy to continue on.  "It won't get any worse, only better.  We can ride it out till the end,"  I assured myself.
 
Two days later--I was twice as bad.  I either felt like I was dying or wished I was dead--and I was very worried about my baby.  I started calling rehab centers, recovery resources anything I could find a number for.  I was confronted with basically the same answer--no one can help me because I am pregnant!  
 
How could this be happening to my and my unborn baby?  There are no other mothers with my circumstances?  I was lost and alone!  I (somehow) made it to the next morning, barely.  I called one of the hotline numbers back and again begged for help.  The nurse remembered me and could not believe I hadn't been able to find anyone that could help me.  Luckily, there was a different nurse there that day and she had heard of a local doctor that may be able to help me.  I quickly dialed the number and explained to the receptionist what was going on.  She immediately asked the office manager to talk to me.  I repeated the whole horrid story to her and she told me she thought the doctor could help me.  She would give him the message and he would call me within an hour.
 
Twenty minutes later I received the call from the doctor she had referred to:  Dr. Helmbrecht.  Within three hours I was sitting in his office.  He had worked me into his busy schedule and seemed genuinely concerned about me and my baby.  Tests confirmed we were both withdrawing.  He promised we would both be doing better by the time I left his office.  That wasn't until about seven o'clock that evening, but, thankfully, we were doing better!!
 
I continued to see Dr. Helmbrecht regularly throughout my pregnancy and on November 28, 2007 he delivered, via c-section, my perfect baby.  Dr. Helmbrecht arranged the whole team of specialists that assisted with the delivery.  He made sure I was taken good care of in the hospital and even made a special trip to see me on a Saturday.  My and my son's recovery went smoothly with no complications.
 
This is not a story I am "proud" of.  However, I am sure there are plenty of people who could benefit from it.  If you don't live where you can seek help from Dr. Helmbrecht, get help from someone like him.  He taught me there are more women, in circumstances similar to mine, than most people realize and that they deserve to be treated with dignity and respect while receiving the best health care available.  Don't be afraid to get the help you and your baby need!
 
I wish you all the best of luck,
Lisa N Virginia
Want to see my son?  Click here  http://viewmorepics.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=viewImage&friendID=381287226&albumID=0&imageID=2944836